We must avoid the temptation to personify God as if He were a human who thinks or acts exactly like us. Worse yet, we may even assume that our own morality exceeds God's and find ourselves shaking a finger at the Creator and saying, "We believe in love and all that is good" forgetting that God is literally good and love (Luke 18:19 and 1 John 4:8, respectively).
When we read God hated Esau, our human inclination is to raise an eyebrow at God. Our definition of "hate" is heavily filtered through a lens of emotion and tainted by sin. When we hate, it often leads to murder, genocide, or apathy. But how does God "hate"? In Romans 9:11-13, the Apostle Paul writes:"Yet, before the twins were born or had done anything good or bad—in order that God’s purpose in election might stand: not by works but by him who calls—she was told, “The older will serve the younger.” Just as it is written: “Jacob I loved, but Esau I hated.”"
The knee-jerk reaction is to assume God is being harsh and emotional toward Esau before he was even born. We risk drawing the wrong conclusion that the God of Christianity just randomly hates people. However, there are two vital perspectives within the text that clarify what "hate" means.
First, Paul is talking about God's sovereign choice of Israel. Israel did not exist until Jacob was born and he was later renamed Israel after a wrestling match with God (Genesis 32:22-32). In this light, "hate" here was not an emotion toward Esau, but rather a term for the selection of Jacob to carry the Messianic line. God also chose Abraham out of all people; He chose Isaac over Ishmael. God chose Jacob and not Esau to fulfill His promise of a Deliverer, Jesus.
The second perspective offers a fascinating observation from a recent Bible study I encountered. If you read the biblical account, God never inflicted discomfort or pain upon Esau. There is no recorded discipline, rebuke, or harsh word to Esau from God. But look at Jacob! He had to flee his home, was deceived by his uncle, and wrestled with God until his hip was dislodged. What do we make of this? Real love was found in the discipline of Jacob. God worked to remake his character from a "deceiver" (the literal meaning of Jacob) to Israel ("he who struggles with God.") In this context, "hate" resulted in no discipline, while "love" resulted in a painful, refining process. Hebrews 12:6 affirms this,"For the Lord disciplines the one he loves."
So, we arrive at two ways to understand the meaning of God "hated" Esau. First, it was God’s sovereign choice to appoint the younger twin, Jacob, for a sovereign plan. Second, God’s intervention was reserved for Jacob through the discipline required to mold him into who he needed to be, or his own sake, for Israel, and for the world.
When we say God loves us, we are saying something far more than an emotional feeling. It means that God has chosen us and that God will discipline us to make us who we were meant to be. This truth is powerful for us today. Christ took on our rejection that can be called a "chosen generation" (1 Peter 2:9).
God disciplines us not because He hates us, but because He loves us. It is a "holy discomfort" designed to make us more like Christ. In Jesus, we find the true definition of God’s love.
Pastor Jason