Churches have always had conflict. Christians are redeemed sinners who have victory in Christ, yet will continue to wrestle with sin's effects. You only need to read Acts chapter 6 to know that the early Church had conflict (regarding food distribution to Greek widows). A popular but overused joke is that if you ever find a perfect church, do not join it for it will no longer be perfect. Everyone in a church has the potential to create conflict. There are 27 books in the New Testament, and a large portion instructs followers of Jesus on how to live amidst struggles, disagreements, and conflict. Is there a way to move forward? One of the best pieces of advice ever imparted to me was the "4 S's" by Dr. William Carl, former President of Pittsburgh Theological Seminary. He was the keynote speaker at a presbytery pastor's retreat, and I found the 4 S's to be highly simple, clear, and effective. In the first weeks at RB Community Church, I shared them with our leadership of Ruling Elders and staff, and I would like to share them with all of you. Here are the 4 S's:
No
Secrets - We must act in transparency and direct conversations; no hidden agenda and avoid talking behind one another; this builds trust.
No
Surprises - People will be informed, and there must not be blindsiding the leaders with decisions or crises. Inform people early and help them prepare for what's ahead.
No
Subversion - Be loyal and direct. Avoid gossip, triangulation, or undermining colleagues. If there’s a problem, address it face to face with grace and truth.
Lots of
Support - Encourage and uplift one another. Affirm the good, celebrate others’ wins, and cultivate a culture of generosity, prayer, and mutual care.
Consider how much hurt comes from gossip. Imagine how much further people can go when encouraged. Trust flourishes in a setting where we can rely on each other. The 4 S's don't eliminate conflict, but they invite Christ's community to live in harmony and trust. When we live with no secrets, no surprises, no subversion, and lots of support, we create an environment where grace provides room for us to grow. My prayer is that RBCPC would be known not for being a perfect church, but for being a trustworthy one where people speak in truth in love, lift one another up, and reflect Christ's character. In Christ Alone, Pastor Jason